


Go See Gabe, Sam

by imthetitanic



Series: Gabe Needs You, Sam [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Hospitals, Kissing, M/M, Sam's stressed out, mentions of past suicide attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-10
Updated: 2015-07-10
Packaged: 2018-04-08 15:45:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4311060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imthetitanic/pseuds/imthetitanic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Part 3 of 'Gabe Needs You, Sam'. </p>
<p>Sam doesn't know if he should go visit Gabriel in the hospital because he thinks Gabriel probably hates him. He calls Dean for advice.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Go See Gabe, Sam

**Author's Note:**

> Triggers: mentions of suicide attempt

Sam hadn't been able to work up the courage to actually walk back into the hospital after he forced Gabriel in there. He kept telling himself that what he had done was necessary, kept picturing what would have happened had he not, but he barely believed it himself. From his few sociology classes, he recognized he was having some belated bystander effect, thinking that someone else would have helped, that Gabriel would have survived if he hadn't had him admitted. 

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that wasn't the case. In that same small corner, he also knew that he needed to go talk to Gabriel at some point, if they would let him in to see the other man. Could he even have visitors? This was all so new to Sam. 

He slammed his law textbook shut. No use even trying to study with the amount of worry running through his mind. He got up from his desk and fell face-first on his dorm bed, which creaked ominously under his weight. He groped around for his cell phone and squinted at the screen, pressing the button which would call his brother.

"Sam." 

Sam released a small sigh of relief at his brother's voice. "Dean, I need help."

"What happened?" Immediately, Dean's slightly bored, slightly happy tone shifted into brotherly concern. 

Sam thought about how he should phrase what he was about to say. "Cas's brother called me a couple days ago. And I had him admitted to the hospital." Sam didn't give any of the in-between, and expected Dean to ask questions.

His expectations were quickly fulfilled. "And why did you do that?"

"Because he was about to jump off the damn roof, Dean!" Sam kept his voice hushed so he didn't disturb the people around him in the dorm. "What else was I supposed to do?"

There was a brief pause. "You did the right thing. What do you need help with?"

"Should I go see him? Talk to him?" Sam felt like he was coming across as vaguely whiny, but Dean didn't mention anything about the tone in his voice.

Instead, he said, very seriously, "The man called you when he was at his lowest. Samuel James Winchester, you get your ass to that hospital and talk to him."

Sam bit his lip, unsure of even what the hell he would say. "How do I talk to him?" 

"Like a person, Sam!" Dean was exasperated. "This is Cas's brother. He's awesome. Just go talk to him."

Sam nodded, completely aware that Dean couldn't see him. "All right. I'll try."

"There is no try," Dean said, then laughed. 

Sam rolled his eyes. "Come on, man, don't go all Yoda on me." He laughed too, still stressed but not nearly as much. He'd go see Gabriel. 

"Too late it is," Dean said, and then they both cracked up. 

"Jerk," Sam said when he caught his breath.

"Bitch." Dean paused. "Go see him. Please."

"I will. Thanks, Dean." Sam smiled as his heart constricted in fear. Both feelings were accurate. He'd finally get to see the man again, but at the same time, he was terrified for what Gabriel probably thought of him. 

"Anytime." Dean hung up before Sam could say goodbye, in typical Dean fashion. Sam swallowed and went down to his car. He looked fine, he knew, and why did he even care what he looked like? For God's sake he was going to a hospital to see the man he had put in that place. Gabriel probably hated him, so why was Sam smoothing his hair down like a twelve-year-old?

He got in his car and drove to the hospital, not even bothering to turn on the music. When he got there, the nurse at the desk (whose nametag read Jude), said, "Visiting?"

"I'm here to see Gabriel Novak?" Sam wasn't even sure if the man was allowed visitors.

He was shocked when her first question was, "Are you Sam Winchester?" He could only nod. "Gabriel keeps talking about you. He goes back and forth between anger and...I'd call it wistfulness. You can see him."

Sam heaved a sigh of relief. "All right. Thank you."

"Let me take you to his room." Sam nodded with a smile and allowed her to lead the way up a couple floors and down some hallways. She knocked on a doorframe. "Gabriel? Visitor." She didn't say Sam's name. 

"Let me guess, it's Cassie, come to apologize yet again for not picking up the phone. I don't want to see him." Gabriel's voice was just as broken as it had been on the roof, and Sam wanted to run to comfort him, but he stayed back. 

Jude entered the room and sat in the chair next to his bed. He was gaunt and haggard, with a frown on his face. "It isn't your brother, Gabriel. It's Sam Winchester."

Gabriel's eyes flicked toward the door. They met Sam's eyes, and something flashed in them. "He can come in," Gabriel said tightly.

Jude nodded and got up. She muttered to Sam as she waved him in, "He's upset, so be careful."

Sam just nodded to that and went in. Gabriel was propped up on pillows and his arms were crossed. "They won't let me leave," he said without preamble and without letting Sam speak. "You just left me here and they won't let me leave."

"I'm sorry I never came back," Sam said gently. "I didn't think you'd want to see me."

Gabriel laughed. It was a cold sound, and Sam suppressed his shiver. "Of course I did, you asshole. You don't just leave people in the hospital."

On instinct, Sam reached out and took Gabriel's hand. Gabriel uncrossed his arms at that, allowing Sam to hold his hand. "I'm really sorry, Gabriel. I wasn't sure what to do."

Gabriel smiled sadly. "I know. I'm sorry I put you in that position. I never should have called."

Sam suppressed his small gasp at that. "Of course you should have called. I'm glad I was able to help you."

"I'm not." Gabriel's smile disappeared. "I wish you would have let me die."

"I can't do that," Sam said, realizing it was the absolute truth.

Gabriel looked at him curiously. "Why not?"

This wasn't the right thing. This wasn't the right thing at all, but Sam couldn't help it. He leaned over and kissed the other man gently on the lips. At first Gabriel didn't respond, but then he kissed Sam back. Sam smiled into the kiss and broke away. Gabriel's eyes were filled with shock. "Why did you just do that?" he asked. "Not that I minded, but why?"

"Because, Gabriel Novak, I've wanted to do that since you took me up on my offer of free hugs." Sam hadn't been conscious of it at the time, but now he understood why he had been so drawn to the man. 

Gabriel snorted. "Sure you have." He dropped Sam's hand and withdrew. "I think you need to leave."

Sam nodded. "If that's what you want, I'll do it." He got out of the chair and moved toward the door. "Sorry."

Gabriel shook his head. "Don't be. Will you come back?" 

Sam was getting confused by the messages he was receiving. First Gabriel wanted him to leave and now he wanted him to come back? But he smiled gently. "Of course. When do you want me to come back?"

Gabriel thought about it. "How about tomorrow?" 

Sam nodded. "I can do that."

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think!


End file.
